Need help describing metal

[SliceOfDog]

I figure some of you will be very good at this! I'm writing a short story, and I need as many different descriptions for metal as possible, whether it be the sight, the sound, even the smell.

I don't need specifics, just how you might describe different metals, so for example: rusty, dull grey, bright silver, etc.

The characters are walking through a scrapyard, so the metals will mostly be vehicles, household appliances, and also the floor is littered with nails, bolts, screws and so on. So anything describing the appearance, the sound of nails beneath their feet, what it might feel like if they reached out and brushed across an old car, or sound if they threw a handful of nails into the air, or things like that.

All I'd like to avoid are things that are overly scientific or that name specific metals, like iron, steel and copper.
Any help would be greatly appreciated, and I will of course share the finished project on here. If all goes well, it should be a good one, and I might try getting it published in a journal. Only time shall tell...

[Wolfgang of Borg]

> All I'd like to avoid are things that are overly scientific or that name specific metals, like iron, steel and copper.

Umm, can we mention things like iron, steel and copper? Not being able to analogously describe something as having, like, "a verdigris-like patina" is a pretty major handicap.

Also, i doubt many people think of metals as having distinct smells, but as to tactility and taste, well...

[SliceOfDog]

Sorry, perhaps I should have explained myself a bit more. I realise it's a tall order to ask for, but I do think two heads are better than one, which is why I threw the ball out here XD

The protagonist, and narrator, is a child. The community he comes from is also not a scientifically minded one. The descriptions really need to be based on the senses. In fact, the main point of the story is that they misunderstand what the metal is.

I suppose I might as well explain it, but the effect of the eventual story will be ruined for anyone who reads this (although the whole thread is really giving a bit of a hint!)

Spoiler

The story takes place in a very basic, almost medieval society. The children find a 'bone', and after a bit of discussion make their way to the off-limits 'boneyard'. They go there, description of the bones takes place, the children start to fight as the main character peels away and begins scraping dust off of one particular bone. It reveals the words (or something along the lines of) "Rumney Scrap Yard". What they call 'bones' are in fact bits of metal from modern day, and their world exists long after the fall of our society, where civilisation is starting to rebuild itself. The children are not in any way aware of what the metal is or what it was used for. They mistake, for example, a dilapidated ship for an old whale carcass

[Wolfgang of Borg]

Ooo, neat idea! Probably we should focus on coming up with everyday (non-metallic) things that someone who'd never encountered such before would use in describing a junkyard.. what first springs to mind is stones and rocks and minerals (given the density), then the textures,.. rusted iron seems like frayed hessian in my mind, non-rusting things would be recognised as being smooth like porcelain, or in some cases slightly pitted like roughly cured leather,.. unusually light items (like aluminium sourcepans / kettles / greenhouse scaffolding etc) might be taken to be something akin to dried-out, crystallized wood or leather...

Edit: Nails and bolts underfoot might sound like weirdly high-pitched crunchy flaky gravel,.. any glass or plastic fragments they find would be like gemstones to them (quartz or amazingly sharp and glittery feldspar or something).

EEdit: steel scaffolding pipes could be thought of as like "stone bamboo", maybe?

[SliceOfDog]

Hah, yeah, different objects would be good. The only one I've thought about in detail is the ship, where they think that the main body is whale ribs and that the remaining metal between it (bearing in mind it's been battered and beached during the apocalypse, and resting here for many years) is petrified skin.
I want to slowly introduce an element of confusion by beginning with genuine bone descriptions. The object that the first child finds is a screw that has been preserved very well underground (perhaps encased in clay or, I don't know, melted glass or something), and it's described simply as two fingers long, dull grey with a bulge at one end and the other end being sharp (I'm paraphrasing of course, I'll word it better in the story but that's the gist of it). That could easily be a real bone. However, the longer the story goes on, the more metallic the descriptions, so they will comment on the bones being silver and glittering in the sun, and even towards the end use words like "rusty" (He rubs his hand along the 'petrified skin' of the ship and comments on it being rusty, despite still not stating that it's metal). I want to throw things like that in to confuse people. Then hopefully with the final reveal, it becomes clear.

In a very related idea but one that I decided against using, I thought about making the "Bleeding Bones" as a landmark on some apocalyptic world. The idea would be very much the same, only all the metal is washed up on a beach. As the tide comes in and out, the rust of the metal peels away and colours the water red, so that as the tide recedes, it appears that the 'bones', or the bits of metal, are literally bleeding. If I were to use that in a future project, however, the humans would be aware that it was metal, and simply call them bones because of the appearance from afar, or when they are submerged or something similar.

*Edit - Somehow missed this at first; "Nails and bolts underfoot would sound like weirdly high-pitched crunchy gravel..."
Exactly what I'm wanting to go for really, although not sure how to describe it exactly. I thought of the word 'crunching' (in fact, the very sentence was "remnants of the past crunching underfoot", which I like because it can, of course, apply to both the idea that they're bones and the literal fact that they're modern day objects. Both would be 'remnants of the past') However, my worry is that 'crunching' would give the impression that they are breaking, being crushed by the footsteps, as old, brittle bones would do. Any way you think I could get around that idea?

[Wolfgang of Borg]

Heh sorry i'm used to writing in like a text editor or IDE, where you normally first write the broadest possible outline of what you want to say and then gradually refine it.. all my posts here start out with just a few basic thoughts and then are repeatedly re-edited, gradually tending towards what i'd like to have said in the first place...

> my worry is that 'crunching' would give the impression that they are breaking, being crushed by the footsteps, as old, brittle bones would do. Any way you think I could get around that idea?

Um "grinding" or "settling"? Idk, you're the English student, thesaurus ninjutsu seems like it should be your bit.