S.W.O.R.D : Men in Blue, Women in Green, and Dragons in Purple

[OdinAshcroft]

Hello, one and all,for its time another installement by the comic book wuff, Odin Ashcroft. First off I want to apologize my lack of a post last week. Things have been rather busy as the semester slowly winds down to its end, and it pulled the wuff into getting final projects into motion. I apologize for this, but in the meantime, I was also preparing material to a certain “broadcast” many will hear in the future. But enough on that. Secondly, this week I ‘m going to do something a little bit different. Instead of going on an editorial on a big event or concept, I’m going to be doing bit of a review on a recently released issue of a new mini-series, as well as explaining characters and groups mentioned, as it’d help keep give people some idea who these characters are. And what title have I chosen for this? A brand new series that includes many facets of science fiction AND a big blue furry plus a sentient space dragon! So, let us begin with S.W.O.R.D issue 1.



Now, S.W.O.R.D. is an acronym for Sentient World Observation and Response Department, and acts as a government agency against Extraterrestrial threats to world security. So, yes, Marvel’s answer to the Men in Black, while being modeled after its other agencies like S.H.I.E.L.D or A.R.M.O.R. On the cover are a mix of familiar and new faces. Fans of the X-Men would recognize two…sort of. Let me explain. The blue furred figure to the left is Hank McCoy, X-Men’s lovable Beast….Yeah, let me explain. See, most people probably remember the Beast as looking more like this.
　

　
Well, in the early 2000s, before there was a mass reduction in mutants, there was in fact a “Baby boom” of mutants, which also lead to an effect called “secondary mutations”, which lead to a lot of mutants mutating even more. The Beast was one of then, becoming much more cat-like, eventually becoming like this.


　
So, it’s the same Beast, just a bit more on the “Wild side”. The other “X-Man” on this cover is Lockheed. Long time fans of the series may know him as the “pet”/companion to Kitty Pryde, a mutant girl with the power to become intangible at will. Lockheed is in fact, a very intelligent alien dragon from another world, who had just happened to become attached to the teen girl, becoming (throug her) a member of the X-Men and Excalibur (think X-Men of Europe, and you’d be pretty close). He has become a full time member of S.W.O.R.D due to the disappearance and possible death of Kitty Pryde, now quite surly and become bit of a drinker (Trust me when I say, it is just as adorable as you could think). Anyway, as for the other two characters, the green haired secret agent is Abigail Brand, the commanding officer of S.W.O.R.D. and creation of Joss Whedon (Yep, that’s right, the creator behind Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Firefly, and Doll House), who is actually half alien herself (which results in her natural green hair, able to speak alien languages, and power to form energy around her hands which can burn through metals. To her right is Sydren, who is the resident telepath of the organization, although he has a habit of saying the obvious, something that gets him a remark from Agent Brand, time to time. So, cover out of the way, lets get into the book itself.



We open up to Earth…well, a space station up above Earth, monitoring it and space, as a montage sequencing up to date briefings on possible invasions and M.S.S’s (which means Mysterious Spooky Signals. Yeah. You can tell this isn’t going to be TOO serious a comic). And all this is being read to the commander of S.W.O.R.D, Noah Bennet!

…Wait, wrong show.

No, this Horn Rimmed Glasses is none other than longstanding bureaucrat and @$$hole, Henry Gyrich, a person Avengers fans would recognize as their former government liason, infamous for causing many of the groups problems in the 80s, as well as issues for the whole super hero community since. Now placed as co-commander of S.W.O.R.D by Norman Osborn (long story short, he’s pretty much running the country ^^; ). So, he and Agent Brand continually butt heads due to Brands long standing policy of handling aliens clashes greatly with Gyrich’s long standing disgust with all things different with “normal” Humans (Oh but he’s not racist. He’s just being being proactive and patriotic, seeing that all aliens are threats to Earth, including ones born there (such as Brand). He has this similar stance with all superpowered beings, be they gifted with them or born with them like mutants, which leads to a joke about Brands boyfriend, whose none other than…



Yep, Hank McCoy. However, you’re probably wondering why Beast looks so different to the cover. Well, John Cassaday does the cover art while the story is drawn by Steven Sanders, who I will agree, has a bit of a problem drawing characters but his sci-fi facets and backgrounds are quite good, so its forgiving, so excuse the Blue Billy Goats Gruff, and continue.

So, after a trip in a flying car we transition to this delightful exchange between Lockheed and Sydren, as Lockheed continues to wallow in depression at the loss of his companion, Kitty Pryde. And yes, I am also a bit disheartened by the fact how Sydren looks like a lanky alien blood hound as opposed to a cooler looking reptilean agent, but I digress.



So, interesting developments bring Sydren to interupt Brands and Gyrich’s clashing of ethics, leaving behind Gyrich and…seriously, that final panel alone, I can’t help think either comics are trying to make Gyrich more like HRG or HRG happens to be a lot like Gyrich (in looks only, as I actually like Noah Bennet a lot more than Claire, but that’s a topic for another time).



So, as shes off to hopefully prevent yet another invasion, shes told of her BROTHER being on board, trying to seek shelter from an intergalactic bounty hunter. And when I mean brother, I mean half brother, which gives us the first look at a full blooded member of the species shes only half blood to. And yeah in this style, he looks like a lankier greener version of Beast, in this art style. But anyway, so, we come to learn he’s on the lam from this bounty hunter, having supposedly stolen a priceless, sacred artifact, which puts him in not one but TWO contracts: One for the artifact, and the other for his life. And when we finally meet his hunter ,its…



OH.MY.GOD. Its Death’s Head =D!!!!! *fan wuff boy squee*

This is a long time favorite of mine, cause hes an cyborg bounty hunter (correction, the term he uses is “Freelance Peace-Keeping Agent”. Traveling in space and time, he has developed quite a cult following for his adventures and unique brand of humor. But what makes him best cause not only is he canonical in the Marvel universe, he actually hunted down Transformers AND the Doctor (from Doctor Who) on different occaisions! So, not only one sci fi staple, but THREE he has been apart of. Why they had to kill him off for Death’s Head II (who will NEVER again be mentioned because of the bastardization). Anyway, back to the story. So, after a funny exchange, Brand’s brother is still in their custody, but are quite sure things are far from over…and it wasn’t, as Death’s Head captures her brother and quickly absconds with him. So, after calling in her “A-Team” with the exception of Sydren, they prepare to race after the bounty hunter…but stop by to check with S.W.O.R.D.s most protected prisoner for help. Ladies and Gentlemen, meet the robotic ecquivalent to Hannibal Lecter…



So, “Unit”, is a brand new character, so I cant give you much back story, but seeing how he has to be locked away and can only trasmit any date trhough “informational qurantine”, he could be quite the bad guy. So, with a team comprising of Brand, Beast and Lockheed, the group succeeds in catching up with Death’s Head…



Did I mention he is a BIG mutha…?

Meanwhile, as the mission to save Brand’s brother is going on, Gyrich is pleading with the Peak Council, which seems to be S.W.O.R.D’s bosses, explaining that a S.W.O.R.D. under Brand has put the Earth in danger too many times, especially after the recent invasions by a variety of aliens, this is true, but what he proposes is not only stop all invaisions, but stop the “invaision” already happen. So, what does that mean?



Yes, every alien on Earth, visitor or Earth born, is to be “sent home”. Now, I’ll admit my ignorance for a lot of the non humanoid and some humanoid aliens in this picture, but I can name Adam X the X-Treme (Sigh, don’t look at me, he is a by-product of the 90s -=- ), Karolina Dean ( aka Lucy in the Sky…no seriously), Elloe Kaifi (red skinned member of the Warbound, and former allies to the Hulk), Hephzibah (former Starjammer, current X-man, and homage to Miz Mam’selle Hepzibah), Hulkling (who is NOT in fact related to the Hulk what so ever, but in fact, an Earth Born Skrull/Kree hybrid and the Son of the hero Captain Mar-Vell. Go figure), Slipstream ( whose vast teleportation powers are used through a surfboard. Yeah, think Silver Surfer. But Lamer.),Ultra Girl (oh yay, another super powered blonde, THAT’S original), and Beta Ray Bill! (An Alien Thor? With a kickass hammer called Stormbringer? LEGEN. Wait for it….DARY!). And of course, this list includes Brand, Sydren, and Lockheed, and I’m sure this includes ALL The other aliens not shown on the list, but I’m sure we’ll see them over the course of this series.

And in the final analysis: Great concept, good use of characters, EXCELLENT choice of characters (Death’s ****ING Head!), and love where the series could go with this. However, I admit there are faults: some of the jokes are forced and feel rushed and the rather disappoint character styles on people like Beast do hamper things but I’ve seen much worse. I recommend S.W.O.R.D, and hope it gets some positive attention, and doesn’t drastically change its direction a couple dozen issues into its run *glares at Marvel, holds up issues of She-Hulk, and Exiles* Fool me once, shame on you…Fool me twice, shame on me…Fool me thrice, and not even your new landlord Mickey Mouse will stop me from coming up there and kicking your mutha-

*PARAGRAPH REMOVED DUE TO PROFANITY, GRAPHIC IMAGERY, AND ILLEGAL USE OF LAWN DARTS, PREPERATION H, AND FLAMINGOS*

…And the horse you rode in on! Anyway, that’s it for my attempt at a new format for my segment. I hope you all enjoyed it! I promise to try and keep a better schedule of posting these. I’m Odin Ashcroft, your Comic Book Wuff, and I read it so you can too! Hopefully see you next week!

[Fenryx]

Intriguing, I may need to actually give this series a chance.

[Psion]

For some reason I'm picking up a small Judge Dredd vibe off of Gyrich's uniform. Eh, probably my imagination.
Comic sounds interesting, have you heard of Metadocs perchance?

[OdinAshcroft]

For some reason I'm picking up a small Judge Dredd vibe off of Gyrich's uniform. Eh, probably my imagination.
Comic sounds interesting, have you heard of Metadocs perchance?

Well, that could be intentional, cause like I said, S.W.O.R.D. is a rather recent, retroactive addition to the universe, so there wasn't a standard uniform to go by, which would explain the various space suits/armors/uniforms worn by various personnel serving various purposes (much like S.H.I.E.LD. but as most their uniforms came in different colors instead of different uniforms to begin with, at least until recently, of course)>

Now, I've HEARD of Metadocs but havent been able to get myself a copy to read. The concept is nice, and I do have a soft spot for stories about real life professions that have to adapt to a world of super heroes and villians, be it bars (Hero Happy Hour), police (Top Ten or Powers), or even donut shops (Common Grounds...yeah, seriously, but its actually a great comic,even with that premise). So, I'd be willing to read it if I could just find a copy =3

[Psion]

Now, I've HEARD of Metadocs but havent been able to get myself a copy to read. The concept is nice, and I do have a soft spot for stories about real life professions that have to adapt to a world of super heroes and villians, be it bars (Hero Happy Hour), police (Top Ten or Powers), or even donut shops (Common Grounds...yeah, seriously, but its actually a great comic,even with that premise). So, I'd be willing to read it if I could just find a copy =3

I had to order my copies through my FLCS but I do have both issues (yeah, the series hasn't received that much attention from Antarctic Press) and the publisher website does have a "Issue Zero" posted that introduces the main cast which takes the usual superhero archetypes and gives them a medicinal bent. We have the super-genius gadgeteer who founded and runs the hospital, we have a few magic-users including the incredibly awesome Dr. Drake, and we're introduced to the "other" heroes through frequent or long-term hospital visits (such as the vaguely furry Stalagmite.) Overall it's pretty good, with enough other hooks to interest people who wouldn't go for episodes laden with medical jargon.